Holly’s your run-of-the-mill chick flick heroine: she’s got it all under control, just. Her promotion has her working quite late hours with attractive people, but sometimes she has the odd hour spare to go to expensive clubs with more attractive people. “The one thing I don’t have is him!” she sighs. Who’s this “him” we’re all ogling after, I hear you ask? (Go on, ask the computer screen. Humour me, we’ll call it an early Christmas present.)

It’s not one of the ruggedly handsome guys hanging around everywhere in this film- seriously, they all look so alike. It’s like the film consulted a casting agent who has a very particular type and really wants to make that clear. Anyway, it’s not them. She’s talking about a mannequin. Good job he gets the memo and COMES TO LIFE when she hits her head?!

Suddenly, all ideas of perfection Holly’s dreamt of come alive. However, this film sets out to tell us perfection is a terrible thing to ask of a human. This is true. But also, mannequin man (who, by the way, is called Bo. Unless that’s followed up by “Burnham”, I just don’t want to know Bo.) acts unlike any realistic expectation of a person either. He is crazy, not to mention a complete control freak. From inviting his parents unexpectedly to her flat, to moving her sofa (which Holly complains about but never changes- lazy much), to cancelling one of her work’s photo shoots (!!)- he showcases the mother load of uncalled for traits. His excuse? “When you know, you know.” Know what, that you’re the worst?

Speaking of "the worst", check this amazing fan poster I found. Holly, the mannequin, and the floating head.
Speaking of “the worst”, check this amazing fan poster I found. Holly, the mannequin, and the floating head.

I mean yes, he’s plastic, and the worse Bo looks the more Holly comes round to believing Milo’s just the right combo of caring and not a psychopath to satisfy her. At this point I’d normally continue to tear into the film, but just about here I realised I was actually… caring about Holly and Milo’s budding relationship! I know, I’m invested in a seasonal movie! In a legit way! Their chemistry is really genuine, and that’s when you start to notice everything else about the film which isn’t terrible. The clever ribbing models get for being vapid, the token ditzy yet ultimately wise assistant, Bo’s ex walking with her silly plastic arms. Yes, they’re all clichéd old rom-com tropes (except maybe the plastic arms thing), but they’re done well! Admittedly, Holly waking up in the hospital- because it was “aaaaaalll a dreeeeeam”- is a bit dumb, but also great because it erases the whole awkward situation with Holly having to admit to herself that she nearly tried to have sex with a mannequin. Win win!

Could this be it? Have I finally been well and truly won over by a seasonal movie, so early in the run up to Christmas? Fear not, schlock seekers- there is one gem of bad accent going for this film if you don’t want your heart warmed by lovely rom-com vibes. Where is that British boss from? My guess is that he got his speech training from the same school as Captain Jack Sparrow and Prince Charles. Post your answers in the comments section below!

Rating: Ho Ho Ho/Ho Ho Ho.

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