I’m kidding guys: although Sourdough Bread Day is real and completely called for, Say I Dough is not a real film. I know, I’m disappointed too. That was my April Fools’ to you, but worry not- I get mine in the form of Hallmark’s April Fools’ to me, the making of this film.

Mira aspires for a lot of things in life. She has a fantasy at the beginning of the film where she talks about a rug, ignores her boyfriend to go to work and grins maniacally at computer programming bugs. I’m…I’m real glad we’re following such a fun-loving protagonist for the next 83 minutes.

Mira works for Your Page, one in the line of terrible social media rip-offs in this parallel universe where technology only developed as far as 2008 and then stopped. Oh how I laughed at the big revolutionary game-changer of arranging the homepage as a cube that looked like it had been made on Minecraft or Windows 2000. A reminder, this film was legitimately made in 2014. It was made all the better for the preceding overlong montage of everyone working super hard and writing on glass like it was A Beautiful Mind. To be fair, their best graphic designer had left the company to further his career as author/illustrator of a scary cartoon pig.

Speaking of long brainstorming sessions, how long do you reckon went into this photoshoot?

I don’t think Mira’s got a great idea of what April Fools’ Day actually entails. She just lies to a load of people without clarifying that it’s fun and games- which to her credit actually gets her everything she ever wanted. So the lesson here is, always lie. Glad we all discovered that together. Oh, she also thinks you can’t sleep on April Fools’ Day- as evidenced by her line, “Forget sleep, it’s April Fools’, fool!” I don’t really have anything to justify this bloody weird non sequitur but it is some brilliantly random dialogue.

There are a lot of laughs to be found with Lucky in Love, which I was pleasantly surprised by. Mira’s obvious (to everyone but her) love interest- aforementioned scary pig illustrator- is told to tell Mira how he feels about her by three different audience inserts at regular intervals. Even the boss is like “I’ve had enough of your moping shit” (though not in as many words). Also weirdly his scary pig story about aspirations and settling kindof mirrors Mira’s plot. Top tip: always compare the girl you like to a scary pig, 100% success rate. Mira’s sister is great too. When she’s not getting ignored in her own easily-overlooked subplot (“I’m not sure my husband’s the one” “okay cool, what are you ordering for dessert?”) she’s spouting stuff like “you look like a hobo coming out of a yoga class” and “ninja shopping time”. Really made me wonder about the calibre of hobos and ninjas in wherever this was filmed.

On the other hand, it does shy into the sea of mediocre Hallmark Channel movies a bit too much to warrant it three star HoHoHo material. Like Mira and her boss get stuck in a lift and against all expectations of the Stuck in a Lift trope they don’t kiss? What the hell? Also, for a film called Lucky in Love, she’s surprisingly unlucky in love for about half the duration. What a stupid title.

April Fools’ Day rating: 2/3 probably sleeping too much. Forget sleep fools!