Retelling A Christmas Carol is so common a TV movie trope that this particular retelling has a production of A Christmas Carol within the film. It’s a village play performed by the kids (some of which piss on the stage), directed by Heather, who is separated from meany businessman E.B. In case this isn’t clear, he is the Scrooge insert (non pissing edition).
Ebenezer Scrooge needs to lack all empathy at the beginning of his arc, which is why My Dad is Scrooge falls apart whenever E.B. interacts with his children. He’s capable of love, just a little busy. I don’t understand why he warrants haunting by a host of talking animals.
Ah, yes, another departure from Dickens’ original vision.
I wish these recently homeless animals (guess who announced foreclosure on the farm? Okay, E.B. is a bit of a prick after all) were trying harder in terms of voice acting. The ensemble includes Bonnie Wright as a bunny (Ginny from Harry Potter, she of the excruciating mince pie scene), a dog who cannot emote happiness (you know, the emotion invented by dogs) and piglets who can drive because “how else do you think we go to market?” This is less a voice acting issue, more my horror at piglets driving their kin to the slaughterhouse. Fun family film.
There’s little pay off for these animals being in the film, minus a scene where a man solemnly tells a goat “you should leave”. Instead, it pads out the film further and creates an ever-more confused end result. The child actor playing E.B.’s daughter June also doesn’t help matters: this is a girl old enough to project, too young to enunciate.
Steel yourself for a very infuriating final sequence, in which E.B. invites himself back into the family home (Heather did not say you can come in?), starts making pancakes and invites the evicted farmers over too. It’s Christmas morning, by the way! I’m all for extending an invite but surely it needs to come from Heather whose house it is? Everybody laughs too loudly to be sincere and I decide I hate this film.
Rating: Ho/HoHoHo
An [insert here] for Christmas! 
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