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An [insert here] for Christmas!

While shepherds watched their schlock by night…

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Review

The Three Dogateers Save Christmas (2014, dir. Jesse Baget)

I wanted so much from this film and instead I am an empty husk. Welcome to The Three Dogateers Save Christmas!

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A Cinderella Christmas (2016, dir. Tosca Musk)

Are you ready for the same story you’ve heard a billion times before? Then I’ll begin.

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A Christmas Carol: The Musical (2004, dir. Arthur Allan Seidelman)

This is a story that on face value you’d equate with the Charles Dickens classic but I disagree. The original Dickens Carol is a ghost story which leads to the transformation of an old miser. A Christmas Carol: The Musical starts with me channel-hopping, saying “is that Jane Krakowski?” and going wild from there.

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Don’t Look Under the Bed (1999, dir. Kenneth Johnson)

I’ll be honest guys: I didn’t finish watching Don’t Look Under the Bed. I made it halfway through and thought, this is enough. I’ve looked under the bed and there’s just no reason to continuing the film hiding under there.

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All Hallows Eve (2016, dir. Charlie Vaughn)

“Are you watching a crap film again?”
“Yep, it’s called All Hallows Eve and the protagonist is called Eve Hallows
“Oh God.”

Welcome back everyone. Join me if you dare as we embark once more on the best and worst of Halloween flicks…

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Santa’s Little Helper (2015, dir. Gil Junger)

You know you’re in too deep in the world of crap seasonal movies when you find yourself A) watching your third film starring Mike “the Miz” Mizanin, and B) considering that the Miz’s acting has really improved a lot since Christmas Bounty. I’m just making myself cosy down the rabbit hole.

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A Princess for Christmas (2011, dir. Michael Damian)

Yay, yet another story about an American who encounters an obscure royal family unexpectedly! Again!

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Santa Who? (2000, dir. William Dear)

Santa Who? has one of my favourite opening sequences in all seasonal moviedom. Let me try to set the scene for you.

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The Christmas Shepherd (2014, dir. Terry Ingram)

I hate it when a film preferences dull if competent romance over presposterous dialogue and wooden leads.

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